Oh Hell no!!! These men typically have low self-esteem, cannot get better, are older and desperate, or simply have no other options. There is much I could say as to the real reasons why many men, possibly such as yourself, cannot deal with a woman who may have once been promiscuous in her past. kidsbut things were crazy for me four years ago. We would also need to So if u sleep with 5 guys u keep a part of them five guys with you for a long time. I understand where you are coming from, but I do not fully agree. it. You feel it might reflect on her character and increase her chances of cheating on you? to sex or you just think sex is okay and doesnt affect people much. issuesshe is not responsible, etc. A slut is a slut. So not every loose girl is just doing it for fun. The vagina is made to accommodate different sizes. Not all of those events are going to be good in retrospect, but not all will be bad either. Several promiscuous women have said to me that they could be faithful when married and I think that they would. So I just focused on the specific concern of the number of men a woman has slept for this. Its become a trend now for premarital sex to happen but some girls don't approve it. You may not mind to share your life with someone who has share herself with everyone who show some interest but for me it is very a very important detail as it is part of the whole person you arechoosing since I have that capacity of choice I want to have a nice person as a whole including a matching in our values personally I am sure I would not go ahead with a woman with this kind ofbaggage. Life is short. Your honor, Ive been arrested for those rapes which occurred 4 years ago. Men get to play while we sit at home waiting for our love? Some women can be a virgin and have all kinds of issues due to other experiences in their life, while a woman may have once been promiscuous, turned away from that and now is in a much better place mentally and emotionally. Who has moved forward and disregarded her past. I really do agree that the double standard about sex partners is ridiculous. I think at the end it all comes to self respect I dont think a woman who shares herself with anyone who gives her attention will be able to commit to a monogamy relationship It is just against the nature of herbehavior, you cant pretend to have adifferentvalue system regarding sex (how you call it in your post) and then embrace monogamy and change that values all over again Other topic I would like to suggest you analyze is the fact that if a woman has slept with 100+ men for example what is the difference between getting married to that woman that to a prostitute? Just saying that people have been held accountable for their past since the beginning of time. On the other side of the fence, as a woman, I wouldnt want to subject my future partner to having any kind of issues with the number of men Ive slept with. haha Also A LOCK that is open by any KEY is a USELESS LOCK!, To my point of view we all have our premises on how we chose our partners (size, color of eyes, color of hair, etc) for me the number of sexual partners of the person I would chose it would be also a factor I have to admit that bumping into a ex partner would be a negative effect but to me is more the idea of this person being more able of controlling herinstincts a bit better than an animal or not.. Maybe if you learn to use it, you wont have to ask other people to do your work for you. Definitely dated and slept with two different things. His name is Jesus Christ. Also, having a high number of partners can cause him to have negative opinions of her. Furthermore for both sex d rare and tear is evident. Its like me saying, The sky often appears blue. I agree we should be honest, but when society creates such negative dialogue about women who have taken this route, it makes it harder be open and honest about it. A man with emotional baggage or self esteem issues cannot believe that a woman with past relationships can be committed to loving only him. Secondly, men want to marry women who have not slept with a I dont care if you date women whove slept with over 20 or not. Interesting. If you did respect her, you wouldn't really be having this conversation, would you? These weren't the low quality dudes either. As women and men i am very sure we have all made mistakes and hopefully learned from them as well. You will get married to Joe. Animals in nature **** and get the hell on and have never had a problem I dont know why humans try to put themselves so high on the food chain of nature. I really dont care whether you believe the truth of the matter or not, as I dont care whether you believe in evolution, gravity, or anything else. but not an automatic deal-breaker. I understand a lot of what you are saying, but the main thing to remember is not to judge someone on their past. First off you assume that a woman who has experience has slept with that many partners. I have just as much right to sleep with however many men I chose, even if its none. Self-Confident. Altamera74, from a chicks point of view, you are going to end up a very sad and lonely man if you take that sort of attitude into your life when it comes to choosing a partner. You are the very reason Stefan was inspired to write this article. Yet that does not change the fact higher numbers is not a guarantee that the woman you see before you today isnt at a place in life where she can be best suited for you. your such a b.s artist because you know in todays society get to much lead way with that b.s. Now i am hurt. Thats what alpha men do in the truest sense the word. 15 years later and it doesn't matter even a little bit. The best way to evaluate who a person really is, is toyou knowactually look at how he/she has lived his/her life. If they say they dont feel secure in the relationship, I feel like I'm just in her head sometimes lmao. Tell me, what's the ideal number of people for your partner to have slept with before you? I agree. Clap , Clap , Clap.. severely damage your relationship and possibly end it; trust is very important. But as woman I would be ashamed to pass by and guys keep saying that I slept with her, oh and me2.. Peace. Men, if you think a woman sleeping with 10. We should strive to be righteous. Not a good example. Just dont call the guy u miss out on him immature or insecure Yeahman, if I were you I'd just take this whole things easy and use the time to work on myself. Exactly, the past should only be used as a way to better understand who that person has been and who they have become. It is amazing to see how in other That is all this article is trying to relay. I might ride in it a Rest 4-5 wait for. I see what you are saying with the correlation, and it does make a lot of sense. So having lots of casual sex it a good indicator that a woman has emotional problems. Sleeping around especially as a girl is similar. I agree. I do not like the double standard but I cannot deny that it exists. Obsessed much? Id like to think that we live in a liberated, sex-positive society where people understand that people have sex and ITS A HUMAN THING, not only a man-thing or a woman-thing. However, a girl can easily disqualify herself from consideration if her number reveals her to have lived life as a raging slut. I am available to help have the discussion. It is about not judging a woman based on her past number of partners. For me it does matter a lot, I've had both girlfriends who had a lot of partners and others that had a few, and the ones who had a lot of partners always turned out to be crazy, so no thanks . In addition, last time I checked, a woman is not a car to be driven. These are odds I wouldnt take. So Stephan following your argument, if you would find a woman who 5-10 years ago had a gangbang and half of the town where you live had sex with her but now she is a very nice woman and has changed her values, you will embrace her and take her as your partner without having any problem or concern? No one wants to date or marry a hoe. I dont know if youre a male or female judging by your username. My parents argued constantly when I was a child and still do to this day. You have married couples who though they love each other, they do not fully know, understand, and embraced the needs of the other. I never wanted her run through thats why i tackled her youngps shes 20 and im 20..and im a virgin. This is why the whole idea of using her number of past partners as criteria is unnecessary. but come on now. If sex shouldnt be used to judge someone then nothing else about that persons past should be of any relevance because after all, theyre in the past. If a woman only shares her body with those she loves then it means more to be with her. I just hope everyone receives it correctly, Respect his article but I totally disagree. I understand some of your arguements. And know that there will be days your not overwhelmed in thought. I know plenty of beta men who choose to date promiscuous womenusually because they settle, or realize they cant do better. You have always been a dreamer, but you've never thought that your dreams will come true. Knowing her past is good in understanding who she was and who she has become, but who she is today should hold the most weight in determining if she is the best person for you. You havent listed any statistics relevant to the discussion. My point in the end is although it shouldn't matter, it does. Sex isnt an act that comes with an inherent morality- the ethical implications of sex all depend on the context. Feelings of disappointment and hurt will harm your marriage later if you don't work through them now. Dont judge. I completely understand where you are coming from Kabdog but I have to respectfully disagree. Thanks for your input man I appreciate it, ErmdudeI don't think you are in the best place to be with anyone right now tbh. Im just happy you were open minded enough to actually read it again and see where I was coming from. By the help of the Queen mother _= A RUNS GIRL TURNS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE !!! I too have hurt my partner many times with my venting. Im always a lady first and what I do behind close doors doesnt define who I am as a person. I mean you right we shouldnt judge by tha way Im a lady but come on get real please no matter wat you say a woman first of all sleeping with over 20+ men shouldnt expect to be in a healthy good relationship with a man who hasnt slept around like she does this article is ridiculous for real cause you didnt mention that a woman should be a woman and have respect for her body and self-respect as a woman period. My body doesn't want anyone else when I love someone. Back in the day (I mean waaayyyy back lol) it was all about having a virgin. Nothing you read or learn will help you. She had never been sexually active and would only have sex if it was in a relationship with a man she loved. Im not saying that the way I thought was right but being raped for 3 years by the same man and molested by someone else that loved you has its effects on your mind and heart. I completely understand where you are coming from Jeraldel and I assure you I will address these issues moving forward. Granted, I agree it may all come from some traumatic event or maybe an ongoing psychological/sociological issue (ie lack of a father or mother etc) andIn fact, the promiscuous women did suffer from some deepissues. He settled down and married his partner, Gabriella Wesberry, in 2010, the same year that Simply Red broke up after two and half decades together. Lmao @ Whale Poop. Its up to the individual to decide that for him or herself. Im also comfortable with myself and my happiness is not determined by whether or not I have a partner. So youre in love and want the relationship to work. The people that hurt you had there own issues that they never resolved, so their actions were not a reflection on you or your worth as a person. Hey Mike. 5) Problems leading long-term relationships. Its not about being flawless and perfect. Id like to think that its not all a hush-hush, giggle-giggle, shameful thing and that being adult means we can handle the reality that people mothers, fathers, aunts, uncles, sisters, brothers, men and women have sex. This statement makes no sense. Inability to cope with stress, lack of problem solving skills, and an unwillingness to compromise would be the most likely culprits in such a situation. Bascially what im saying is if we never had numbers to say oh well having sex with 20 men makes you a hoe then we would have to base that on how she occured those sex partners. Its sad but girls qnd guys are just not wired the same I would find disgusting to kiss a woman of that kind. All is equal and fair. woman who values herself. Why are we so stuck on this? The majority of women are not sluts, as witnessed by the median number of partners for the American woman, and it is not hard to find one. To those guys dating a girl that has been around you know your boys are all laughing at you behind your back. If you are dating with marriage in mind, it is important to look for qualities that would make someone a good life partner. I have sex like a man. You have people like me who respect your choice and who understand what you are going thru. Not to mention her self-esteem would of been shattered. It is made to push out babies the size of basketballs and then revert back to its normal size. Others may have been dealing with some deep issues and did not know how to properly handle it. Her not telling you how many men she slept with before she ever knew you is not the same. The two women above were no different. The average women doesnt care. And any woman He is a very successful and attractive man so I know for a fact that he has been with many, many women so I think we both know to not bring up the topic. You can be with a woman who only tells you she only slept with 3 guys when in reality you may have to add a 0, or two 0s. I get so excited all the time with her, cause I know she was a slut and Im proud of being a slut too. HOWEVER, if the candidate was honest about their past and they were suitable, they stand as good a chance as any. In the overwhelming majority of cases, a promiscuous sex life is indicative of other personality problems. Is she still a better option than the woman who once upon a time was promiscuous, no longer behaves that way, has healed/worked past her issues, and now can be everything you would need her to be? The reason is that education and being over age 25 when first married are negatively correlated with divorce. Brothers like you are the reason so many women act like men these days. what we can do is discuss what may be a more effective way of going about things and encourage taking that route. Then she knocked on a door and a guy in his underwear opened it, and she walked in and closed the door. Well written! Yall remember the movie House Party.when Bernie Mac remembered ole boys wife at the dinner table.smh They use to call you jawbones.lmaaaaaaaaaaaaaao nahhhh.Ill pass on all that. Btw, there is only one true ALPHA in this entire universe. Thats a load of crap! Depends on your age. The problem that it really boils down to is that we women experience just as many urges, hardships, emotions, and whatever else that a man does yet for whatever reason we have to live by this stupid separate code. Obviously the more people you sleep with the higher your possibility of having an std are. So the numbers are irrelevant. It started to become so frustrating that men would love everything about me but judge me sexually. I feel like my bf doesn't love me anymore and it scares me. You should have an idea that its not a good look. (tongue in cheek). you do? I am sharing my experiences and opinions. I believe it is truly best. First, ever since our common ancestors walked out of West Think its unfair? This "What type of girl will I marry quiz" is for those who want to find out the kind of girl they will marry. PurplePillDebate is a neutral community to discuss sex and gender issues, specifically those pertaining to /r/TheBluePill and /r/TheRedPill. Now, I know you didnt use any of these words. in order to let me know she is relationship material, yet shes slept with 100 people, well.I wasnt born yesterday. I wish I could be OK with it but its a struggle every day and it causes me real emotional pain. sacrifice some of your freedom (not a ridiculous amount), give them access to There are enough people in the world for those to attain who they desire as they judge and chooseand more than anything it is the persons actions that will speak louder so there will be no room to judge for anything past or present! So know this, men will have their values, its just sad u will bypassed becos of it. Yeah I agree. Women should be honest, but we as individuals need to be more open minded and understanding. The reality is that many people marry for the wrong reasons. I have observed and had manydiscussions withmy female friends, colleagues, andwomen ive dated, as well as read the facebook & twitter posts of women I am less familiarwith but know thata few of my friends are VERYfamiliarity with. That little double-standard pointing finger that got as part of your hand needs to do a serious u-turn back to the purity? Whats up bro? A person exposing the number of past partners has nothing to do with the present moments situation. I just responded to your other comment so I will keep this response short. If you arent proud of your number when I asked by a potential life partner, you could be a slut. For example, if your first sexual experience is a violent one, pain could cause you to become numb sexually and emotionally. Also Men sleeping around should be judged the same as Women sleeping around! Im 26 years old and have never given myself to anyone. Im in it right now. THANK YOU DEEDEE26I HAVE A FRIEND WHO IS 37 AND IS A VIRGINONE DOES NOT HAVE TO BE A VIRGIN BUT I APPLAUD WOMEN LIKE YOU WHO HOLD YOURSELF TOGETHERIF WE LOWERED OUR NUMBERS MORE MAYBE THEVALUE WOULD GO BACK UP! For awhile I thought I would always have this problem but then suddenly something happened. I just want men to explore a different perspective on this issue. Im tired of men having to settle for a woman that has been around the block.. Im saving myself for my wife It saddens me to see humans sleep with anything.. Men and women are worth more than that Smh -_-. Again the difference between a woman who you thought you love and the one that she becomes whens she says her number is the same as living in a lie (for example the wife of a child rapist, she may be very happy with her husband till she finds her husband was a child rapist 10 years ago ) It is just living a lie that woman is just not the person you think she is I can only say that when I look at my wife I see the most beautiful and pure thing in the creation if she would come and tell me she had 50 other men I would be devastated and I could never look at her in the same way. If your just hitting it no big deal. forgotten how to be committed. I have seen women who had only slept with one man end up being loose while in a relationship. Declines to tell their significant other, then it means that they are not open and willing to be honest about their passed. Report. If you're honest more than likely you wouldn't. many issues that person will have from having sex with so many people. early whether you are worth an investment (remember the biological urge If you feel that this is the case, maybe consider whether it is fair for her to have you in her life. Why must women be held to an higher standard than men? Nothing wrong with knowing who she was with in the past, but understand and respect who she has become in the present. discuss it. I had been with 100 myself. That is all the article is trying to say. lol but seriously men and women should be viewed the same. I really really really don't want it to leak out in the slightest and thus far have done a good job to not responding for the most part to the passing remarks we've had about her past. We will not live forever and we are of the flesh. Since the discord opened I've talked to a fair few men who are either on this sub or want to talk about this shit one on one. Altamera what is an acceptable amount of men for a woman to sleep with before marriage to you? So, for me the number of sex partners she had would not be an issue at all. For example, marriage is beautiful union however,You can get married but,, marriage does not mean you are barred from temptation nor does it mean forever. Is this a JOKE? I reinforced that sex was a major responsibility, must be done with responsibility, and that I definitely preferred that she would wait until she was marriedbut that if something changedprotection was a must! Come back and continue to live. Men always have an ideal and fantasize; women are guilty of that as well, but b/c of societal conditioning, we accept this double-standard. The fact is that how I have decided to look at my wife is not an issue within myself I look at her in the way she has represented herself to me if she has misrepresented and has been sleeping around she just built a lie around her and I have looking to a fake picture of the reality. His Grace is so much greater than all of our sin! As for Step your game up! Sex shouldnt be a competition. She eventually cheated and we broke up. Being old-fashioned is not an excuse. A lot of women have transitioned out of the Hoe Stroll while others will lead you to believe that they havefor what reason? Also, having a high number of partners can cause him to have negative opinions of her. sleep with more people towards the beginning of their dating/sexploration stage There is no double standard. Personally, I think that men and women should strive to have a lower number of sexual partners but I don't think that women should try to act like men in the thinking that having numerous partners is a good thing. reading this I can see that you only wrote this to make yourself believe that its OK you slept with a 100 guys . I dont know if i should open up anymore or not. Men spread seed and women try to attract the best seed they can find. You also assume that these women who love sex you reserve it for the men they love actually have love prospects. Though I hate emotional baggage. throw it in their face. If you are a man with 3 children with 3 different mothers, there is something wrong. Blanksie_11 you make excellent points and I do not disagree with you. Your experience may vary. I will not look down upon people who do not agree with this, I just genuinely feel that they may not be taking the best approach. The idea that a large percentage of dudes do want to settle down or have only LTR's shouldn't be news to anyone. A person exposing the number of past partners has nothing to do with the present moments situation.. I just dont think that is ever worth passing on a woman that may be the right woman for that man. Why can a man act one way, and be a male whore, but as soon as a women states anything in reference to men and sex, she is a whore? Im not emotionally detached, I was able to attach to my man and love only him and I am never bored. My message is simple, life and relationships require truth. That there is no way to properly address things and move past what you used to do? Much more women than ever are sleeping around these days. Not to mention the problems I've tried to avoid by those men who slander her name. Choosing a good partner can have a major impact on your well-being. Either way we can just agree to disagree. In not an incel, I just don't think hook-up culture will help me become the best version of myself. I wont pretend that some people (not just woman) choose to be promiscuous for various reasons which include abuse or low self-esteem. Look stephan r watever ur name is.. it DOES matters and you sitting behind a damn screen debating with tha whole world on tha number of men a women sleeps with shouldnt matter when in reality it does in todays world. Research this and spread the word help the future generations from this. Do you know women feel the same about men sometimes. I Think that u r bringing this up is great and it needs to be talked about more.i Think when u Get older u Think more about this things and talk about it and see that people can change and of course u go thrue life experiance different things.we r not all the same and what people do different things and shouldnt be jugded by their past. A womans body is different. I'm trying to learn how to differentiate but it's fucking difficult man. Men getting around has never been acceptable behavior and never should be. They say that all men are dogs, do not want relationships, and can not commit. Will you feel it is worth walking away from this amazing woman because a couple of years ago she was once promiscuous. I know it would be for me. Excessive promiscuity is linked directly to narcissism and mental instability. Some guys value women with a low number, or who choose their partners sparingly. So try again to express your desire to know the truth no matter how tough of a pill it is to swallow. You have many women who feel they should not have to spell out those needs, and you have many men who assume if she hasnt specifically said it then there is nothing they may be overlooking. Dude, you better check yourself before you mess yourself! Do you think she Will she affected by my departure? But you are as a person. This month marks the 20th anniversary of Elizabeth's return home and on this week's episode of All In, we speak with Chris Thomas who acted as spokesperson for the Smart Family throughout their entire experience in searching for Elizabeth. This woman typically has no boyfriend (or a boyfriend who doesn't care that she fucks other men) and simply goes out looking to get laid. Youre doing the right thing, love beats all just think how you would feel looking back at now when youre on your death bed about to pass onto the other realm. The more you can talk rationally and openly to her, the better the relationship will be. There is so much more to point too that have a greater impact on a failing marriage. Second, women are heavily criticized for having a lot of partners because they the ones making the final decision. At the end of the day none of those could capture her heart as you have. i could never date no one thats slept with a lot of people. 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