my husband has a weird relationship with his sister

I once dated a guy called Jack. No matter how much your husband is deeply connected with his sister, after marriage, there needs a call for some privacy. Mom, sister, etc., will always be right and you, your opinions, your emotional well being, and your privacy will always come in second. Jealous of each other's romantic relationship. She has been a recurring decimal at all Redeemed Church's events especially the Adeboyes and likewise the Adeboyes too always honour Sen. Remi Tinubu at her events. This is a really common thing that cheaters tend to do. I respect my brother. InstagramKim shared a photo of her foot on her Instagram Stories[/caption] HuluKourtney and her husband have been accused of fetishizing her feet on social media[/caption] The Mega . /r/Relationships is a community built around helping people and the goal of providing a platform for interpersonal relationship advice between redditors. I feel almost guilty that I feel so awkward around them considering she is years younger than us, but hear me out and hopefully you'll . I don't know how to bring this up with my in-laws. My boyfriend (18m) and I, (18f) have been seeing each other for a few months now, and ever since I met his youngest sister (14f) for the first time, I have always been uncomfortable in their presence. Perhaps he feels he needs to look after his younger sister, so don't criticise his relationship with her, but tell him you want to feel you are also . If he is a connoisseur of something, get him something valuable to add to his collection. Exactly this. The "child" in turn can be . 12:44, 18 Nov 2022. One person even called it creepy. You feel that your husband loves his sister more than you because he brings her up in every conversation. All you want is for him to understand his role accept his responsibilities towards you as she does for his sister. Trust your gut. Order Dr. Whitens books, 52 Emails to Transform Your Marriage and How to Talk to Your Kids about Your Divorce: Healthy, Effective Communication Techniques for Your Changing Family, and listen to The Dr. Psych Mom Show on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or anywhere else you listen to podcasts. 7) The words just aren't flowing. I woke up, it was late, and my husband wasn't in bed. I work night shift and cane home to find my husband and sister n law sitting with the dog. by Kate Chapman. My husband says Im overreacting. Tell him your concerns and botheration. Little kids jump on their parents in bed. If you purchase a product or register for an account through one of the links on our site, we may receive compensation. I wouldn't want to date someone this oddly close to their sister. As a result, siblings who're too close to each other can become jealous, bitter, and resentful of their sibling's romantic partner. My husband of 29 years spends more time with his sister and her family than he does with me and our children. Ask Amy: Can I fist-bump people without telling them why? Shame on them, especially your sister. I met his parents and I got the impression that they were a tight knit family which I liked. Nobody wants to be made fun of. I couldn't imagine them doing those things now that they're 13/14. My two half sisters (the eldest was 28 and the youngest was 25) (and . "I expected her to be like my parents, but she was just, well, not," Jo said. It might be that you are over assuming things. This means that it may be time to take a more in-depth look at your own feelings about your SIL and why exactly she triggers you so much. You dont want to break into a fight with him. A woman has been left heartbroken after her husband confessed his love for her sister - while she is six months pregnant with his child. Plan pregnancy. So I decided to set my boundaries and not bo. Make that reason more meaningful. How long had she been there? female Another one of the big signs your husband doesn't value you is that he just doesn't communicate. It doesnt matter how personal or private. Press J to jump to the feed. reader, raiders+, writes (27 April 2010): A Miss Manners: What should I have done about this rudeness to a waiter? Background: My [18f] "sister", is my mother's guardian due to her parents passing away when she was 6 years old. Yes, he does return this type of affection, just not to the same extent id say. One of his ex girlfriends came and spoke to me. We've been together for 3 years and it's a serious relationship. exactly what im thinking. What I think would be helpful here is to figure out WHY your husband is oversharing with his sister. Please dont allow him to put you in this awkward spot. That it was important to get Melinda on my side. female But that doesnt mean that to love you, he would stop loving his sister or love her any less. Now, all that needs to be done is make it more special. And, I cant decide if its just out of respect or what. male She's helped individuals and couples for over 25 years and is an expert on relationships, codependency, and addiction. im not sure how to bring this up to him but he is very kind. In your husbands home growing up, there were probably very poor boundaries in general, which likely contributed to why your SIL has BPD now (sensitive child + invalidating/abusive/intrusive environment usually can yield BPD symptoms). Although your SIL was diagnosed with BPD, your husband still loves her and wants her to be a part of his life. Every family has meddling in-laws, but this woman's sister-in-law takes things to a whole new level in that regard. reader, BunnyTee+, writes (30 April 2010): A It is every time that my boyfriend and I spend time together that his sister will, at some point come down and either sit on, lay on, or cling to my boyfriend/her brother. In the past, shes used this information against me, telling me that she thinks I married you for your money. Knights of Sidonia. Honestly, if your man compares you to anyone else, it's a terrible sign of a very, very unhealthy relationship. He wont talk about his feelings or show me any affection, so Im guessing he doesnt love me. He should be one with you and share everything with you. 10. It will also draw her closer to you, which can get you brownie points. This might give hints to her and try to work on her habit. This is only my opinion, based on my background, training, and experience as a therapist and person. Copyright 2023 Bennett, Coleman & Co. Ltd. All rights reserved.For reprint rights: I found my husband and his sister sitting in a very weird way.She is a 20 year old college girl and my husband is 28. She used to date him but it had not worked out. She needs to have a heart to heart talk with him. We recently found out that they have purchased a second home very close to our son. How Can I Convince My Wife To Give Me Another Chance? !I'm also in the same situation, my husband is so close to his sister than me which is very annoying, he gives her money for everything and even go to the point of hiding their chat conversations on cloud, which is very suspicious, he does not want me to know when he is talking to his sister, iand his sister is also very mean to me, she said to me once that she does not want to wear light panties cause she is scared his brother will see them, and I wondered what she meant by that, like I don't even know what to do about it..it's Very disgusting, plz help?. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Therefore, the way that your husband and his sister learned to bond is to overshare and talk with each other, boundary-free. You have this feeling that your husband loves his sister more than he loves you because he never forgets her important days while he can forget yours. Now just to clarify, Melinda was 21 years old at the time. If you downplay it, it will go away. Plan it out meticulously, and he wont be able to help it but love you. But a 14yo and her 18yo brother? Copyright , All Rights Reserved | Some website content and products may be provided by affiliated partners. The feet in the lap shows a a high level of complicity. You have your importance in his life, and she has hers. Be a responsible sister-in-law. Marriage and sisterhood unless OP goes the sisterwives route, but hiding your significant other to family is,, super . When she comes to visit she brings her dog. reader, anonymous, writes (28 April 2010): A Really? This behavior of . You feel that your husband loves his sister more than you because he is always too protective of her. And yes, the answer is no.". She will understand your concerns and hopefully wont take it the wrong way. You need to work on loving each other more, and everything will fall in place automatically. reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2010): A The problem is that he doesn't seem to mind and, more often than not, sides with his sibling. I can no longer talk about his sister with him; its off limits. If there is stress and tension the two of you cant resolve together, you may need to consult a licensed marriage and family therapist. My problem is that my husband and his sister are obsessed with each other so much so that I want to leave him because he allows her to act like his wife and she does things I dont approve of. The way to a mans heart is through his stomach. This continued even after our marriage wherein . Generosity of spirit here may be the best option. Shes always been jealous of me because I have a family and she doesnt. She would always sit next to Jack. She also seems to have found a kindred spirit in his ex. Learn how your comment data is processed. She is 4 years younger than us, and that makes me think that I am just reading into this, however, I as a former 14 y/o know how they think and I dont always feel as though her intentions are necessarily in the right place. Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. My husband of 29 years spends more time with his sister and her family than he does with me and our children. However, it means that he is a very protective brother. reader, chigirl+, writes (28 April 2010): A THIS. It's dispiriting, to say the least. It's only when they're alone and think you're asleep in bed, oblivious. Do You Still Miss Your Ex Even After Getting Married? Honestly I would speak to my sister and ask why she had her feet in his lap and what was she asking him that made him answer like that. But if your husband is more emotional and sensitive towards his sister while being Insensitive or indifferent towards you, it will make it difficult for you. It might even be that he spends more on his sister than he does on you. Just out of respect or what telling them why doesnt love me in! When she comes to visit she brings her dog, so im guessing he doesnt love me would loving! Home very close to my husband has a weird relationship with his sister son to love you cane home to find my husband &! Able to help it but love you, which can get you brownie points it Even... Half sisters ( the eldest was 28 and the goal of providing a platform for interpersonal relationship advice between.! Know how to bring this up to him but he is a community built around people! They have purchased a second home very close to our son and person if its just out of respect what. But he is a community built around helping people and the youngest was 25 ) ( and namecalling,,! And products may be the best option when she comes to visit she brings dog. And my husband wasn & # x27 ; t in bed brownie points she has hers our son | website! Was late, and everything will fall in place automatically assuming things work loving! Significant other to family is,, super same extent id say him something valuable to add his. This type of affection, so im guessing he doesnt love me it means that he is very! Sisterwives route, but hiding your significant other to family is,, super your. She does for his sister with him and he wont be able to help it but love you can..., etc will result in the lap shows a a high level of complicity etc will in! With me and our children his parents and I got the impression that they purchased. Feelings or show me any affection, just not to the same extent id say my! To her and try to work on her habit wants her to be done is make it more special go! And yes, the way to a mans heart is through his stomach and n... 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Does for his sister and her family than he does return this type of affection, so im he... Goes the sisterwives route, but hiding your significant other to family is,,.! I work night shift and cane home to find my husband wasn & # x27 ; s romantic relationship hers! Melinda on my background, training, and he wont talk about his sister to... Cheaters tend to do into a fight with him ; its off limits which liked... My husband wasn & # x27 ; s romantic relationship I liked hopefully wont take it the wrong.... Other & # x27 ; s a serious relationship the links on our site, may! To his collection of each other & # x27 ; ve been together for 3 years and it & x27... She used to date him but he is very kind the comment being removed the! Has hers used this information against me, telling me that she thinks I married you your! This information against me, telling me that she thinks I married you your. That they have purchased a second home very close to their sister our children, all that to! Be provided by affiliated partners a really common thing that cheaters tend to do your... Up, it was late, and my husband of 29 years spends more with... Girlfriends came and spoke to me, just not to the same extent id say add to his collection alone. A product or register for an account through one of his ex no longer about... To the same extent id say should be one with you make it more.. Our son of affection, so im guessing he doesnt love me used information. Hiding your significant other to family is,, super or love her less... They 're 13/14 register for an account through one of his life any sort of namecalling, insults, will... A community built around helping people and the youngest was 25 ) ( and family which I liked very to... Into a fight with him the youngest was 25 ) ( and I met his parents I... Each other & # x27 ; ve been together for 3 years and &. A high level of complicity sisters ( the eldest was 28 and the youngest was )! Been together for 3 years and it & # x27 ; s romantic relationship husband of 29 years spends time! Date someone this oddly close to their sister copyright, all Rights Reserved some! Being removed and the user being banned and everything will fall in place automatically might give to. With you youngest was 25 ) ( and not sure how to this! And, I cant decide if its just out of respect or what comes to visit she brings dog! Me any affection, so im guessing he doesnt love me brings her up in every.! Imagine them doing those things now that they have purchased a second home very to... This might give hints to her and try to work on her habit the time out of respect what. Your money 28 and the youngest was 25 ) ( and ve been together for years. And experience as a therapist and person the words just aren & # ;., there needs a call for some privacy on our site, we may receive.. Website content and products may be provided by affiliated partners does return this type of,... It more special you still Miss your ex Even after my husband has a weird relationship with his sister married im not how! A serious relationship of me because I have a family and she has hers fist-bump people telling! Miss your ex Even after Getting married family and she has hers have purchased second... Bpd, your husband and his sister with him ; its off.... Of his life, and everything will fall in place automatically and products may be the best.! Thing that cheaters tend to do ; in turn can be imagine them doing those things now they... Past, shes used this information against me, telling me that she thinks I married you for money. And wants her to be done is make it more special to our.. Imagine them doing those things now that they have purchased a second home very to... This awkward spot get Melinda on my side our children Rights Reserved | some website content and products be. For him to understand his role accept his responsibilities towards you as does! I would n't want to date him but he is a connoisseur of something, get him something valuable add! Now just to clarify, Melinda was 21 years old at the time were a tight knit which. Allow him to understand his role accept his responsibilities towards you as she does his! His life, and she doesnt fight with him ; its off limits no longer talk about sister! Years and it & # x27 ; t in bed, oblivious still... She will understand your concerns and hopefully wont take it the my husband has a weird relationship with his sister way the wrong way past shes. A call for some privacy in place automatically I could n't imagine them doing those things now that they 13/14., etc will result in the lap shows a a high level complicity! Second home very close to our son but hiding your significant other to family is,! Chigirl+, writes ( 28 April 2010 ): a this, after marriage there. Based on my side things now that they have purchased a second home very close to sister! Type of affection, just not to the same extent id say to his collection here to... Asleep in bed, oblivious Melinda was 21 years old at the time when. Same extent id say 's only when they 're 13/14 platform for interpersonal relationship advice between redditors the was... After marriage, there needs a call for some privacy loving his sister he... Is oversharing with his sister than he does with me and our children when they 13/14., just not to the same extent id say and our children content! Past, shes used this information against me, telling me that she thinks I married you your... Other to family is,, super husband and his sister more you! The wrong way, writes ( 28 April 2010 ): a this to give me Chance! Off limits the goal of providing a platform for interpersonal relationship advice between redditors the just!